


The In Flagrante Delicto Affair

by Buffet_of_geekery



Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Bottom Napoleon, First Time, Humor, M/M, Slash, Top Illya, short fic, virgin Illya
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-02
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-11-08 02:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11072106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buffet_of_geekery/pseuds/Buffet_of_geekery
Summary: "Finish up then my office. Now!"





	The In Flagrante Delicto Affair

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story I've ever put online. I hope you enjoy it. Feedback is very welcome.

"I can explain everything sir." Napoleon panted.   
Waverly puffed away thoughtfully on his pipe. "You can, can you Mr Solo? Let me guess, that was a snake in Mr Kuryakin's underpants that you decided to sit on to suffocate?"  
"Er yeah. I suppose I can't."  
Illya turned a fetching shade of beet root. "Mr Waverly, please, I initiated this. There's no need to punish Napoleon. You can send me back to the Soviet Union."   
Napoleon grasped his partner's hand under the table and gave a reassuring squeeze. "Illya may have made the first move but it's not like I was an unwilling participant. I'll hand in my badge "   
"Yes don't remind me. You certainly seemed to be enjoying yourself," said Waverly. "Calm down boys. I don't intend to get rid of either of you. However, consider this a formal warning. I do not permit lovemaking on company time, and that's regardless of whether it's between a man and women, two men or two women. If you're caught doing this again I will have no choice but to demote or dismiss you"  
"Two women. Are any of our staff that way inclined? OW!" Napoleon exclaimed as his paramour kicked his shin. "I mean, thank you sir." Illya and Napoleon got up to leave.

"And you are aware that what you are doing is illegal?" Waverly continued.  
The agents' sank back down. "Yes sir."  
"So remember to be careful. It's important that you be even more vigilant than usual about checking for bugs, and for your own safety I recommend you not engage in any intimate activities while away on field missions. I know what it's like being young and in love but you really must be careful. You may go now."  
"Really? That's it?" said Illya. For a second, Napoleon was tempted to kick him back.   
"Yes. I can't say I've ever really approved of how close you two are but what can I do? Split you up and you're just not as effective and I definitely can't afford to loose my two best agents."  
"And you won't tell the authorities?" Illya beamed.   
Waverly looked up sternly. "Certainly not. The government has no business sticking its nose into people's bedrooms." he smiled a little. "Just keep it there from now on. You may go now."

By the time Mr Wavely dismissed them it was twenty to six. The corridors where pretty quiet as most of the staff had gone home. Our boys leaned against the walls.   
"I thought we were done for then" said Illya.   
"I know. I've got away with it so many times as well. I could have sworn I locked the door." smiled Napoleon. Illya was stood beside him, eyes closed and with his head tilted towards the ceiling. His neck looked so inviting. Napoleon placed a quick kiss on his Adams apple.  
"Well you didn't." Illya ran his hand over his face. "I can't believe I let you talk me into it," he smirked. "That is definitely not how I pictured my first time."  
Napoleon's face creased with concern. "You're a virgin?"  
"Well not any more. You saw to that." Illya headed down to his office. Napoleon caught up and stopped in front of him. "So how did you picture it?"  
Illya shrugged. "I don't know. Music. Nice sheets. Nothing specific really."  
"Ok, that was a practice." he ran a hand along the side of his lover's face. "Fancy a do-over at my place?"  
"Mmm. Nothing would give me greater pleasure. But let's stop off at my apartment first. Your record collection is terrible."


End file.
